POLICE UNVEIL NEW WEAPON TO COMBAT “MOPED ENABLED CRIME”

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Until now, favela dwelling underclass vermin – AKA “MoPed Enabled Criminals” have had a free reign over the streets of Bullshire.

But, as can be exclusively revealed by Bullshire Online, this is all going to change from today.

“WHEN TWO TRIBES GO TO WAR”

Bullshire’s Top Cop, Chief Inspector Eric Ville, PhD says,

“…When two tribes go to war, a point is all that you can score…”

Dr. E. Ville

The Top Cop continued,

“…We are one tribe; the other is the gang of favela dwelling underclass vermin who rob MoPeds then use hammers, machetes and all sorts of weapons to rob members of Bullshire’s public.  They needed to be stopped…”

Dr. E. Ville

“HIT THEM, HIT THEM, HIT THEM WITH YOUR LASER BEAMS”

From today, all Bullshire Police Officers will be equipped with LASER beam eyes.

Dr. E. Ville added,

“…We will no longer relax; and the power of love simply will not suffice.  So we now intend to hit them, hit them, HIT THEM with our LASER beams…”

Here we can see a couple of feral fucking scum MoPed Robbers causing fucking chaos on the streets of Bullshire.  
LASER Beam eyes are deployed, aimed squarly at the little fucking wankers atop their stolen MoPed
The little cunts explode.

“MAKE LOVE YOUR GOAL”

Chief Inspector E. Ville, PhD

“…Don’t forget to return to Facebook and add your comments to the post on the Bullshire Police page…”

A
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A "Pint for the Social Media Ambassador"

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In the past, if you didn't want to choose to procure 'Bullshire Stuff' you could choose to procure a 'Virtual Pint' for our Social Media Ambassador.
Any forthcoming wedge was put towards 'Morale Bundles' for injured bobbies and to procure various bits and bobs which we donated to the wonderful Care of Police Survivors charity. Naturally, because running 'Bullshire' far from free, wedge was also put towards keeping the lights on at Bullshire HQ.
But now, because our supreme leaders say so, a 'Virtual Pint' cannot be procured; it must be accompanied by a 'Substantial Meal'.
Therefore, if you don't want to choose to procure any physical Bullshire Stuff, you'll have to choose to consider the question of deciding to procure a 'Virtual Scotch Egg' for our Social Media Ambassador; which will allow them to keep the lights on and to continue running all things 'Bullshire'.
You don't have to, obviously. We'll carry on doing what we do, because it's a laugh.
Merry Christmas.
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